Speak like a scurvy pirate
by silvers-edge
Summary: Written for International Talk like a Pirate Day. Roy is confused when Edward starts Talking like a Pirate.


Hey all, sorry for nothing being posted in a long while, I've got fics in process I've ran into walls on. Hopefully I can get them figured out soon. Hope this little drabble helps me get some ideas.

This idea came from the International Talk like a Pirate Day on Monday and I hope you all like it. Unbeta'd and read over by an internet friend.

I don't like the ending and may change it, let me know what you all think.

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><p>Roy Mustang hated paperwork, no, hated was too nice a word, loathed it with a passion was the correct way to express his feelings. It was only 8am and he had already completed an hour's worth of paper work, and based on the stack left on his desk, he had another ten hours worth to go.<p>

Signing his name to yet another pointless piece of paperwork, he sighed and wish for something interesting to happen. Little did he expect he would get his wish.

He sighed as he heard his youngest subordinate walking down the hall, whistling an odd tune.

Hearing gasps from the outer office, Roy could only imagine what Edward was trying to pull this time to illicit such reactions. Determine not to give Edward the satisfaction of reacting to whatever he was doing; Roy kept his head bent over his paperwork.

"Edward, you can't go in there, I just got Mustang working on his paper work."

"Don't worry Lt. Hawkeye, I'll make it quick."

Rolling his eyes as he heard Edward walk into the room, he continued to sign papers as the blond planted himself in his usual place on the couch.

What's so important that ye had to drag me out 'o bed 'tis early in th' mornin'?"

Raising an eyebrow slightly, Roy refused to look at the blond, knowing that he was trying to get a reaction out of him.

"Oy, Bastard. Just be tellin' me what ye wan't 'n I'll be leavin'."

"Fullmetal, why in the world are you talking like…why are you wearing an eye patch, and what in the world are you wearing?"

Roy looked up to find that, yes, Edward was wearing an eye patch along with a cutlass across his hip, black boots, brown pants with a ruffled shirt and a three cornered hat with plumage.

Cocking an eyebrow and smirking, Edward answered, only to confuse Roy more.

"It don't matter what I be wearin', what did ye need?"

"You know what, never mind, I'll get Armstrong to do it. I'm filling out a vacation form for you. Take the next week off. Dismissed Fullmetal, oh, and get rid of that eye patch, you look ridiculous."

Blinking, Edward just shrugged before walking out of the office.

A few minutes later Havoc walked in the door wearing Edwards abandoned eye patch.

"Hey Boss, Edward said you were acting weird."

"I'm not the one acting weird, he is. Here, take this out to Riza and have her deliver it to the Fuhrer, Fullmetal needs a vacation, and today only proved it, and get rid of the eye patch."

Taking the paper from his boss, Havoc took off the eye patch and tossed it on Roy's desk. Walking back over to the door, he paused and turned back around, hesitating slightly.

"Oh, Mustang, I think you should know, its International Talk like a Pirate Day."

With that said, he saluted and continued on through the door, Ed's vacation papers in hand.

Handing the papers over to Riza, he sat down and started to work on his own paperwork, only to jump as he heard a loud thunk from Mustang's office.

"I think I should go check on him."

Havoc walked back into the office only to find Roy banging his head on his desk.

"Sir, are you ok? Do you want me to tell Hawkeye to throw away that vacation form?"

Raising his head up, the bright red mark on his forehead was barely visible through his bangs. He shook his head and sighed.

"No Havoc, this will be more of a vacation for us from him than him from the military. That kid will give me gray hairs one of these days."

"Um, Sir? I probably shouldn't tell you this, but you have one on your temple."

A loud yell was heard throughout the military complex; scaring the new recruits and making them believe the rumors that the building was haunted by ghost pirates.

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><p>Thanks for reading through that, hope it made you laugh :D<p>

~Silver~


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